Exactly what is fear? How do you define it? What is your definition of fear?
I think for all of us it is something different, it has to be because we all have different lives with different experiences. Some might be in fear of oh let’s say – the dark. Fear of spiders, fear of heights. It also could do with life stages. I remember being pretty small – under age six, I had a reoccurring dream. The devil peeked in my bedroom window, he was an ugly thing – I remember boils and rough scarred skin and eyes that terrified me. I would scream for my Dad and as soon as he rounded the corner in to my room the dream was over and I woke up. I don’t recall ever telling my parents this dream. It was enough that Dad saved the day (even if it was only in my dream) that devil had no idea who he was up against. I remember (as a child) my earthly father being a tall and very imposing figure to me – he is six foot so that was much taller than me at the time. If we are analyzing my dream then I think the theme would have been that I trusted, I believed that Dad was going to round that corner and then that devil was in for some tall trouble, it was something I knew – I believed.
Mark 5:35-36 5 While Jesus was still speaking, some people came from the house of Jairus, the synagogue leader. “Your daughter is dead,” they said. “Why bother the teacher anymore?” 36 Overhearing what they said, Jesus told him, “Don’t be afraid; just believe.”
As I got older there were things that scared me and things I should have been scared of that didn’t phase me.
I was like many out there who think at some point while being young – oh nothing will harm me – I am 10 feet tall and bullet proof. I believed that too. when I became a Mom, there were many things that brought on my fear, something happening to my daughter, something happening to me. Those fears didn’t stop me or us from living, they were just thoughts that crept in to my brain when I should have been trusting, I just was not there yet – that would come later. I did fear, because I was a single parent, making choices that would mess up my kid. Important things that I needed to get right.
Isaiah 41:10; 13 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.
At 39 finding faith actually amped up some fears in me. In the beginning I feared I was genuinely not worthy. I was one of those who said – but God you just don’t know me, I’ve done, said and been things that are not good. I’ve lied, I’ve said things negative against others, I’ve loved other things more than God, I never killed anyone, nothing super big like that but I’ve been a sinner and it just feels, I fear, that it’s not pardonable. At least that is how I felt early on. I had to get to the point where I totally understood about Jesus. It was a scene in The Passion of The Christ that flashed through my mind. He is in the garden of gethsemane, Jesus is talking to God and is clearly under a large amount of stress because his sweat is blood. This is an actual condition that can happen under extreme stress – Hematidrosis. I’ve been under a ton of stress in my life and never had blood for sweat. I remember being naseaus, having a severe headache but not sweating blood. That seems so extreme, He knew – He was fully aware of what was about to happen. He knew He was going to be beaten within an inch of His life. He knew, He was going to die a horrible, painful and tragic death. He knew all this and still did it. He made the ultimate sacrifice. I heard a Navy Seal once say, “We write the check – up to and including our lives”. That made me very aware of my fear of not being good enough feel silly. Jesus died for the sins of the world and I know for sure there are some out there that have a small sin life and some who have one lots larger than mine, either way He paid the price up to and including His life. How can I do anything or feel anything but grateful. Certainly need to put away fear. That is the enemy getting in there and trying to mess you up, tell you that Jesus would not die for you, why would he do that, look at you. Who are you that Jesus would do that for you? Well now I can answer that question. You are CHOSEN, you are a daughter of the most High King, Son of the most High King. We are adopted in to the family of God and you can’t be unadopted.
John 15:16 (NIV) 16 You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you.
Lord, calm those fears in us, show us Your peace and tranquility. Help us always to lean in to You when times we want to fear. Thank You for being the ultimate sacrifice. AMEN
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