It Is So Final – But Is It?

How do I write about this? What do I say? How can I put in to words what I feel? The finality of it all. Wait, is it final? Literally twenty minutes ago I found out that a former co-worker of mine passed away very suddenly. He had not been feeling well, went outside to get some air and passed out only to never wake up. He was not really young but he also was not old either. We think late 40’s early 50’s. He worked in our warehouse sending things out and putting things away, general inventory. He had a fun laugh and enjoyed laughing. I didn’t have a ton of time to cut up and shoot the breeze with him but we got in some giggles here and there every so often. His death makes me think of Ecclesiastes, because I’m trying to make sense of this for myself.

Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: 2 a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, 3 a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, 4 a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, 5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, 6 a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, 7 a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, 8 a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.

I don’t know anything about his family life except that he was a single man. I know he had some hardships in life because he walked with a limp, I never asked him about it because it seemed not to bother him too much, he got around just fine, was a bit slower than most folks but then again so am I. I think sometimes those thorns life gives us makes us better people. In his case he liked to eat and he liked to laugh. Those are two things I know about him for sure. When we had company functions that included food this was his “hog heaven”. So, my thoughts on his passing. I think for the most part he was a good guy, at least what interactions I had with him. I did not see him every day but when I did we had pleasant conversations and it usually included a funny comment from him and we laughed. I’m not sure why it was his time but I don’t question God or His timing. There is a time for everything.

Ecclesiastes 3:12 12 I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. 13 That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God.

So his fate, I know he is close to his grandparents so I’m going to believe that he was faithful and a church goer with them. I want to believe that he is enjoying Heaven without a limp and that thought – that vision makes me really happy for him.

Ecclesiastes 3:18 18 I also said to myself, “As for humans, God tests them so that they may see that they are like the animals. 19 Surely the fate of human beings is like that of the animals; the same fate awaits them both: As one dies, so dies the other. All have the same breath[c]; humans have no advantage over animals. Everything is meaningless. 20 All go to the same place; all come from dust, and to dust all return

I have lots of thoughts about death and dying. I am not really afraid of it for the most part, it’s something that is going to happen, can’t get out of it for sure. I made myself a promise years ago that I would be sure that those people in my life that I love – know it. I mean they know I love them. When my Mom found out she had cancer she was resolved to it for the most part. Most times in my life when the topic of death came up she would be very fast to change the subject – it was taboo for her. She did not want to talk about it or even mention it. About a month before she passed away she said the most beautiful thing. She said, “You know, I don’t want to die – but I’m not afraid”. This from the person who never wanted to talk about it. God allowed her to accept wholly with her life, her legacy and her death. Hearing this was a precious gift for me. It told me God had her in His firm loving arms and would keep her and be with her always.

I can’t control most things in my life, that’s Gods job. I do want to do good things and be a good person. Leave a mark. Years ago my daughter took part in a school program called Shatter Dreams, they did mock crashes, they had EMT’s come to the school, they did mock phone calls to parents, and the kids even spent the night at the hospital in some cases. The point of this event is to prevent drunk driving in school aged kids. Kind of a scared straight program. I attended the show where an EMT showed them slides of crash victims and it was gruesome. My daughter played one of the dead people, she went to classes but could not talk and she wore a tshirt saying she was dead, they had a headstone in the cafeteria for her. When I walked in to the auditorium the kids that were playing dead were on cots with sheets pulled up over their heads, it was one of the most sobering moments of my life. It was a statement and boy did it make an impact on me. The other hard part for me was that I had to write my daughters obituary. I will tell you that was hard too. There is nothing scarier than just thinking about your child dying before you. I never want to experience that.

So as I said, I want to leave my mark on this world. I’m trying to with this blog. I pray for readers and new readers and I pray each new entry blesses you – my readers. My intention is to encourage you and offer you peace and love.

Dear Heavenly Father – I just ask today that you be with Ken’s family right now. Give them strength and peace during this tough time. I thank You – In Jesus name I pray - Amen